The Mighty Sevens made the trip to Holcombe for what was billed as a top-of-the-table showdown… and it very much lived up to the billing. The task was made harder before a ball was even pushed back, with inspirational leader The Mule missing in action and resident speed merchant Whippet Dave Reed sidelined by what sources close to the club have described as “an important meeting with a Big Mac.”

Upon arrival, it quickly became clear this was not quite the same Holcombe side the Sevens had previously put to the sword. Post-match investigations suggest Holcombe had been on the recruitment drive, aided suspiciously by the small detail that Holcombe 4s had a bye this week. Coincidence? We’ll let the lawyers decide.

Undeterred, the Sevens rallied around stand-in skipper Crab, supported by the calm and wisdom of Messy, and took to the pitch confident they could still return home with all three points.
The opening exchanges were encouraging. Slick interplay between Messy and MVG released Mjolnir on the halfway line, who launched a delightful aerial into the circle for the onrushing WPR. He took a neat touch past the keeper but couldn’t quite keep the ball in play—close, but no cigar.

Folkestone were very much on the front foot and soon earned a short corner after some tidy work down the right. Mjolnir’s initial strike was blocked, falling to J-Lo, who selflessly squared it back for Mjolnir to unleash again—only to see the keeper bravely sacrifice a shoulder to keep the score level.
Another corner followed shortly after, with Mjolnir this time finding Messy, whose effort was somehow kept out by an outrageous leg-pad save. 0–0, and Holcombe were already clinging on.

At the back, Luce, Pricey, Crab and OG, with HB dropping in to help, were rock solid. Milk Tray in goal was largely left to admire the scenery, rarely troubled throughout the half.

Against the run of play, the deadlock was broken by a well-placed Holcombe drag flick. Matters worsened soon after when a turnover on the halfway line gifted Holcombe a simple tap-in. Nothing Milk Tray could do about that one.

Heads did not drop. Bakes, MVG and Messy continued to boss the midfield, spreading the play wide to Borris, WPR and J-Lo, but despite creating chances, Folkestone couldn’t quite find the finishing touch.

Half-time arrived with the Sevens trailing but very much in the contest. Another rousing Crab team talk—rumoured to include at least one line that would look excellent on a motivational poster—sent the troops back out believing this game was still there for the taking.

The second half saw Folkestone crank up the pressure. Pricey, marauding down the right, caused all sorts of problems and soon earned another short corner. Messy slipped the ball to Mjolnir, who returned it perfectly for Messy to step inside and coolly slide the ball between the keeper’s legs.
2–1. Game on.

Wave after wave followed, with the Holcombe keeper producing a series of saves—some of which he may not have even realised he’d made. Mjolnir came agonisingly close to an equaliser when a mis-hit pass intended for MVG somehow sneaked through the keeper’s legs, only to clip his heel and roll away from goal.

Holcombe almost stretched their lead during a rally of shots that descended into pure slapstick. The ball appeared to hit the post twice, was then half-cleared by some sort of unholy collaboration between OG, Crab and Milk Tray, and for a moment looked less like a hockey match and more like a long-lost Chaplin Brothers outtake. Somehow, amid the farce, the defensive line refused to surrender and heroically kept the ball out of the goal.

With four minutes remaining, drama arrived. Holcombe entered the circle, Crab won the ball cleanly and was preparing to clear when a Holcombe striker helpfully removed his stick from his hands. No whistle. Play continued. A short corner was awarded. Holcombe dispatched it ruthlessly into the top left corner.

Once again, nothing Milk Tray could do.
But if Holcombe thought that was that, they clearly haven’t met this Sevens side.

Holcombe advanced again, only for the ever-present Crab to lay waste to the move, plundering possession, flattening three challengers and setting MVG loose.
Who seemingly does not possess an off switch and immediately released Mjolnir at the top of the circle. With the keeper on his back and a defender closing fast, Mjolnir channelled his inner Messy, twisting and turning both opponents into knots before flicking the ball past the keeper.
3–2. Suddenly, very much game on.

Sadly, time was not on Folkestone’s side, and the final whistle blew before a dramatic equaliser—or winner—could arrive.

Despite the result, the Mighty Sevens walked off with heads held high. Against a heavily reinforced Holcombe side, they played their hockey from start to finish and showed exactly why they sit at the top of the table. A draw would not have flattered them.
The Sevens now enjoy a well-earned week off before returning to action away at Blackheath, where the push for promotion—and yet another league title—continues.

Post-match, we caught up with captain The Mule, speaking from the slopes:
“The lads put in a huge shift and did about as well as can be expected without me. Fine margins decide games at this level, and I’ve been tipping those margins in our favour for years. It’s hard to imagine we wouldn’t have come away with the win if I’d been on the pitch. Still, we go again in two weeks — ideally with me involved.”

From the bench????